Jingle all the way (Temari's Christmas party!)
by LilMissJerk
Summary: Temari throws a Christmas party and invites all the shinobi to their house! It's a whimsical adventure filled with comedy.


Alternate universe.

Kankuro

I could feel the hard fist of my younger brother Gaara hit the back of my head, I let out a loud groan while turning around to see him on the other side of the bed.

"Get up Kankuro!" he scolded me for sleeping in late, naturally I wanted to pull the covers over my face but I knew he would either crack me in the head again or worse… get Temari our sister to come in and get me up.

"Is something special happening today? Or is it just the fact you're not able to sleep and you want to make my morning miserable?" I asked him in a dull tone, I've come to the point in my life where sleep is my best friend and if you come between us I won't show any respect for you.

"You've always blamed me for everything, you're morning habits are not my fault and if you think it is maybe you should spend less time reading dirty magazines at night and try and get some sleep instead" Gaara said coldly, he may have been right but it's not my fault.

"What's on your head?" I asked him while looking up at the red velvet fury Santa hat on his head.

"Apparently it's a tradition for Christmas, Temari has a special outfit set out for you.. I think you'll like it" He said then walked out of the room without another word.

"Damn it" I muttered while pulling myself out of my bed, my feet hitting the frozen floor. I walked downstairs ready for breakfast, I smelt something cooking and I was hoping it was something good for breakfast but alas I was disappointed.

I saw Temari in the kitchen making loads of gingerbread men and other assorted cookies "Don't touch those!" Temari shouted and slapped my hand when I reached for one.

"Ouch" I drew my hand back then looked around the kitchen, every space loaded with baked goods "I wanted some breakfast but I can't make it without a space to fix anything on, but thanks for the cookie" I said sarcastically.

"Kankuro" Gaara called me from the living room area, I sighed and walked in to see my little brother tangled in Christmas lights. Naturally I laughed my ass off but stopped quickly when he gave me _the death glare_.

"Oh Gaara do you need some help?" I said with a laugh.

"No of course not, I'm just playing with these lovely fucking lights because I'm full of cheer and love and thought that they may need a hug." Gaara said, his voice full of resentment for the lights or my comment.

I was about to step over to help Gaara when the doorbell rang, I held my finger up to Gaara while walking to the door "Hold that thought Gaara" I said then jerked the door open, a gust of snow filled wind hit my face and the sudden smell of evergreen quills caught my nose.

"HO HO HO!" An obnoxious voice screamed, The next thing I saw was a giant tree falling full force against my face and then I felt the ground hit my back as I toppled over. "Oops sorry there… uh-"

"Kankuro" I identified myself to him while he struggled to lift the tree off of me.

"I got the tree like Temari asked!" The weird looking boy with the bowl cut hair and stupid looking santa jumpsuit on shouted loudly.

"Right just put it next to that" I pointed at my brother while picking a few quills out of my hair. I could feel Gaara's eyes burning into my soul so I didn't dare to turn around "While you're at it could you untangle him?"

"You bet!" Rock Lee bounced over with the tree on his back, he tossed it down and made a very loud thud.

I looked at him with a small glare then at the gaping door that was letting in an immense amount of cold air and snow in "I'll get it" I muttered.

"Ouch" I heard a mild slap then saw Lee rubbing his hand "I was trying to help" he muttered, Gaara watched as Lee tried his best to untangle him but it seemed like every move he did made several more knots "Oh I got it, I just have to tug on this!" Lee shouted and ripped part of the cord, it caused the wire to jerk on Gaara's throat and he quickly reached up and slapped Lee across the face.

"You Idiot!" Gaara shouted, I thought it was best if I went back into the kitchen instead of watching.

"Isn't it weird it snows annually on the week of Christmas here in the sand village?" I asked Temari while pulling out the stool by the counter and taking a seat.

"Old St. Nick giving us a gift" she said in a perky tone.

"Right" I said briefly "What's with bowl boy in there? And all the cookies?" I asked her, sneaking a cookie from the pan then dropped it onto my lap because of the heat "shit" I mumbled while playing hot potato with both hands after picking it up again.

"We're having a Christmas party and he brought the tree" She said.

"Oh yeah? I didn't notice" I said with a serious tone while crumbling bits of the cookie off and popping it in my mouth.

I heard a small knock on the door, like it was a child knocking or an old person. Either way I slid off of the stool and walked to the door again, my bare feet making a pitter patter noise against the cold wood floor. I opened the door to see Shikamaru standing there, wearing a fur lined jacket and what looked like pajama pants then beside him his chunky companion. "Oh that's why it was that kind of knock" I said implying it was because of his laziness, I gestured for them to walk inside then when they got through I leaned into the kitchen "Temari your boyfriend's here" I teased.

Shikamaru

As I walked into the sand Shinobi's home I took off my jacket and shoes then looked around but was shocked when I saw Gaara and Lee fidgeting with Christmas lights, Half were tangled around Gaara then the rest were around Lee's legs and up to his waist. I knew this whole thing would be a drag. The only reason I came was because Choji knew there would be food and Temari is the least annoying girl I know.

"Believe it or not it wasn't this bad five minutes ago" Kankuro told me referring to the Christmas lights then walked towards the kitchen "There's cookies in the kitchen" he said.

"Sweet!" Choji pumped his fist in the air and flew past Kankuro into the kitchen. Instead of continuing into the kitchen Kankuro reverted his path and laid on the couch. The next thing I heard was a 'Wagarble garble' then a screech and a thud. I didn't rush to get in there but when I did I saw Temari with a pan in her hand and Choji holding his head.

Gaara

I was sitting motionless while Lee tugged on every cord and I mean every cord. At this point I decided if I sat there it would just work itself loose, My loving brother that was supposed to help was passed out on the sofa. I swear if he drools on my pillow! Ooh.

"Got it! I'll get a knife!" Lee beamed and jumped up to his feet; running towards the kitchen, before I could say anything the wire that was wrapped around his leg yanked him back and he fell face first on the floor.

"Lee!" I heard a loud laugh from the kitchen, The fat boy was sitting there laughing at us both. I let out a long sigh and stood up, trying to untangle myself by stepping on the wires and pulling at them. None of this would've happened if Temari did it herself. My efforts to escape failed.

Lee found his way back to his feet and tried to kick the wire loose, I swear if he starts chopping it with his hand I will murder him in his sleep. He finally broke free and I guess gave up on me because he grabbed his jacket and left.

"Kankuro!" I shouted while walking; taking tiny steps mind you because my legs were wrapped in fucking cords!.

"Gaara could you not" he said with a grungy tone in his voice.

"Ooh" I made great effort not to pick up the lamp and smash him in the head with it. I lifted the cord to my mouth and tried gnawing at it, when I finally reached the wires I didn't think of checking the plug and I bit clear through it and it sent an electrical current through my face. My hair rose because of the static it made and my face went numb then the sudden pain of electrocution hit it. I fell back against the coffee table and busted it completely.

Temari

I heard a groan, crash and another groan coming from the living room. I didn't trust Choji with the cookies and it didn't look like Shikamaru would stop him so I escorted them both out to investigate with me. When I walked in the living room I saw Gaara passed out on the coffee table, his hair singed and pointing straight up, Kankuro was passed out on the sofa as well. I wasn't sure if something had happened to them or someone attacked them but I looked around and gathered what I could.

"Gaara chewed through the wire" Shikamaru said while holding the split cord ends up "But it's plugged in" he continued.

"I AM HERE TO SAVE THE DAY!" Lee shouted while busting the door open, He stood posed with Might Guy his sensei "What happened!" Lee yelled while racing to the cords "they're useless now!".

I let out a loud sigh while placing my hands on my hips, Passed out Gaara, Passed out Kankuro, Oblivious Lee, Cookie stealing Choji, Shikamaru and A posing Might Guy. My Christmas plans are already ruined and it's not even Christmas eve!.

"I give up" I tossed my hands in the air and went back to the kitchen but had to go back in the living room when another person rang to doorbell, I opened the door and saw Naruto, Sakura and Kakashi their sensei.

"Please come in" I told them while stepping aside "I hope you all brought your pajamas and whatever you'll need" I beamed, I threw a sleep over Christmas party that started.. Well the day before Christmas Eve.

"I made sure they had all their things, Naruto didn't want to get out of bed but I insisted he did since you went through all this preparation" Kakashi told me, it seemed like he was the only person happy to be here. Other than Lee.

"Sakura!" Lee shouted and stormed towards her with hearts in his eyes, She dodged him by jumping behind Kakashi and pushing him into Lee's path. I let out a chuckle then tugged Sakura into the kitchen with me "It's guy free in there… except Choji, he's hungry"

"When isn't he?" she asked with a laugh "I think it's very nice of you to throw a party for everyone like this, it's not like we all get along but it's still nice to come together peacefully" She told me while sitting down at the counter.

"I thought it was be a good move for the boys, they can all get together and get along. Gaara needs some friends and Kankuro well-" I stopped while looking in the living room "-he worries me sometimes" I chuckled "I think he should make a few friends also, maybe stop bothering Gaara"

"Is he annoying?" Sakura asked while taking a cookie. I really wanted to smack it out of her hand but she's not a hog like the boys are so I left it be.

I snorted a laugh and nodded "Kankuro? Highly at times".

"Then I'm sure Him and Naruto would be a perfect set of friends" She said while munching on the cookie.

"Hey Temari, why is Gaara passed out?" Naruto asked with his high pitched loud annoying voice "Oh boy cookies!" He shouted and flew into the room.

"Get out Naruto!" Sakura yelled at him with flames coming out of her eyes, his direction quickly turned when sakura yelled at him and he slinked back into the living room.

Naruto

The look in Sakura's eye was terrifying! But the thing I was more interested in was why Gaara was passed out, I naturally had to investigate. My eyes followed every shred of evidence I could gather, Did Kankuro get up and beat him down? I mean he is his older brother. No. It couldn't be, Gaara's too strong. What about Shikamaru? Did he use his shadow jutsu in him and crush him until he passed out? Or Choji.. What do we really know about him, it's odd whenever he's in a serious fight no one ever sees how he kills his opponents.

"Hmm" I stroked my chin as if I had a beard, my arms were crossed as best as they could with my hand touching my face and my foot was tapping.

"Gaara chewed through that wire and it was plugged in" Shikamaru said, as if he knew what my inner thoughts were. I was always iffy about that one, always lazy and dull but behind all that what really lies behind that façade? He's very intelligent I'd had to admit.

"You don't have me fooled! I know it was you!" I shouted at him while pointing my finger, I felt a slight cold breeze from the door opening then a slap against the back of my head.

"Knock it off Naruto!" Ino yelled at me. Why would she care if I interrogated him? "I just got here and you're already annoying me!" she continued.

"Ino!" Temari shouted and waved her into the kitchen, she dismissed me and walked into the kitchen. The tension between Ino and Sakura will get very unnerving for Temari, I hope she knows that.

Kiba & Akamaru

*Bark bark* Akamaru barked at me while wiggling his tail as we neared the door of the infamous sand village shinobi. Akamaru was always jittery around Gaara but not today for some reason. I knocked on the door and Akamaru started yipping again "I know Akamaru but everyone hates when you ring the doorbell, it's annoying" I told him. Before you think I'm crazy for talking to my dog, I can understand him. End of story. I'm not crazy.

"Kiba!" I heard that familiar voice of Naruto Uzumaki, I brought my attention to the person standing in the door and what do you know, it was Naruto.

"Naruto! Hey buddy I didn't expect you this early" I said while walking in the door and taking off my coat and shoes "Or you for that matter Shikamaru" I told Shikamaru.

"When's hinata getting here?" Naruto asked me, I'm not her keeper even if we're in the same squad so I don't know why he'd ask me.

Then again I don't know why I knew the answer to it "She's coming with Neji and Tenten, Shino couldn't make it. He's got other plans" I told them and walked towards the main part of the living room to see Gaara on the broken coffee table. Maybe that's the reason Akamaru wasn't afraid, but I couldn't leave him on the floor like that. I grabbed Gaara's arms and lifted him up, tossing his smaller body over my shoulder "Temari what do you want me to do with Gaara?" I asked her while walking into the kitchen, each of the girls were chattering and giggling. I felt uncomfortable like they were planning something diabolical.

"Could you take him to his room? It's upstairs down the hall and in the last door" Temari told me with a smile "thank you for taking him off of the coffee table" she snickered, the other two stared at me like I interrupted something important so I turned around and walked out of the kitchen and walked up the narrow staircase, trying my best to not hit Gaara's head on the railing.

"God you're limber" I muttered while pushing his door open with my foot, when I walked into his room I wasn't very surprised when I saw it was just a bed, dresser, a desk and his gourd. Not a very decorative guy is he? I mean if it wasn't empty I could see him decorating it in menacing red and black with skulls on the end of each bedpost and spiders dangling off the roof. I walked over to his bed and laid him down then taking a few steps back, my curiosity wanted to investigate the gourd he always had with him. It's obvious that's where he keeps his sand, it was the source of his protection so I jotted over to the gourd and went to grab it but Akamaru started yipping. "Not now Akamaru, hush" I scolded him while trying to open the gourd, he was persistent though and kept it up until it turned into a whining bark. I looked up at where he was barking at and saw Gaara standing over me with that devilish look in his baby bluish eyes, the slit of a mouth he had wasn't changing expression but his hand was held up to me. Could this be it? Is he going to kill me with his sand?.

"Gaara" I stood up quickly and grabbed Akamaru "I was just-" I stopped abruptly when he took his gaze off of me and to his gourd, the sand was rising from the gourd and starting to circle around his hand. In the seconds the sand was rising my heart started pounding like crazy, I bolted for the door. I could hear the slamming of his bare feet on the ground following me, he wasn't running like I was though but he continued to follow me. I got to the stairs and missed one of the steps, it sent my body tumbling down the stairs but I got back up and slid into the kitchen "Temari!" I yelled in pure fear that Gaara would kill me. He stormed down the stairs and slammed his hand against the arch of the entrance to the kitchen. By the time he had gotten in there I dove behind the counter, kneeling down so he couldn't see me, Temari looked down at me because I was hiding right beside her feet.

"Where is he?" Gaara's deep cold voice asked.

"Gaara you're not killing anyone today, so put the sand up. Please, if it was any other day I would let you but just let it go" She said, my heart slowed down again while I listen for his reaction.

"He tried touching my gourd!" he shouted then I heard him give her a small sigh "alright… just this once" he told her, I stood up after he said that then held my hand up.

"Gaara, I'm sorry I touched your gourd. It won't happen again" I assured him.

"It won't happen again, that's for sure" he told me, his voice full of doom then he simply walked up the stairs again.

Kakashi

Through all of the noise from Kiba falling from the stairs, Kankuro snoring, Naruto talking to Shikamaru and Choji and the girls all talking in the kitchen I found it extremely difficult to read my book so I sat it down.

"Ladies" I said while walking into the kitchen with a smile "mind if I come in and keep you all company?" I asked them.

"Pull up a chair" Temari said with a warm smile, even through Gaara's and Kankuro's behavior Temari has always been gracious to almost everyone.

I pulled out one of the stools and sat down next to Sakura "Thank you".

"Would you like some tea?" Temari asked me, I gave her a nod and tapped my fingers in the counter but stopped in case I annoyed anyone.

"I thought you were reading" Sakura said while blowing on her cup of tea.

"With Naruto talking?" I laughed.

"Right" she laughed with me. It seemed like Ino and her had gotten along so far, but then again Sasuke is no longer here for them to argue over so their quarrel is useless. Temari handed me the cup of tea and held out the small bear shaped bottle of honey.

"Thank you very much Temari" I beamed and grabbed the teaspoon that was set out for stirring, I poured a small amount of honey in the tea and stirred it; taking in the lovely scent.

Kankuro

I heard a loud crash coming from the stairs and it jolted my body awake, I looked back and saw Gaara storming down the stairs then heard some inaudible voices from the kitchen then he returned up the stairs and Kiba walked carefully into the living room at the same time Kakashi stood up and walked into the kitchen.

How many people showed up while I was asleep?. I wiped my mouth


End file.
